Thursday, September 25, 2014

September 25, 2014

Holy Newspeak, Batman.

You wake up in the morning, feeling groggy, and make your way to the kitchen, where your better half has thoughtfully kept an inviting pitthalai tumbler and dabara of Kumbakonam filter coffee made from decoction brewed fresh just this morning. You take the coffee and head over to the front doorstep and pick up the The Hindu (could it be anymore South Indian? I could make it so, but let's not digress). You park your South Indian butt on the couch, mutter an expletive at the ad (real-estate, natch) that the folks at The Hindu have whored out their front page for and start reading the news, while at the same time taking the first sip of hot coffee.

And spit out the housefly that somehow made it into your coffee when you weren't looking, and continue the stream of expletives triggered by the first-page ad.

Alright, I made this up (the decoction and the pitthalai bits are true though, and I do read The Hindu every morning) but nothing compares better to the reaction I had on reading excerpts from Obama's speech linked to above. As someone who weaned himself away from the mainstream news a long time ago, I shouldn't really be surprised, but the chutzpah still hits you hard.
Russia’s actions in Ukraine challenge this post-war order. Here are the facts. After the people of Ukraine mobilized popular protests and calls for reform, their corrupt President fled. Against the will of the government in Kiev, Crimea was annexed. Russia poured arms into Eastern Ukraine, fueling violent separatists and a conflict that has killed thousands. When a civilian airliner was shot down from areas that these proxies controlled, they refused to allow access to the crash for days. When Ukraine started to reassert control over its territory, Russia gave up the pretense of merely supporting the separatists, and moved troops across the border. 
This is a vision of the world in which might makes right – a world in which one nation’s borders can be redrawn by another, and civilized people are not allowed to recover the remains of their loved ones because of the truth that might be revealed. America stands for something different. We believe that right makes might – that bigger nations should not be able to bully smaller ones; that people should be able to choose their own future.
 Far more articulate and better-informed folks on the internet will give this the reply that it deserves. I will stick to what I do best, i.e. writing dodgy haikus.

Crimea secedes?
Bad. What about Kosovo?
That's different, folks.

Voentorg for brothers?
Sorry, we frown on these too.
Syria? Not same.

Russians invade? Where?
Can't tell you. What? Don't trust us?
'K, here's a twitpic.

MH17?
Buk Buk Buk Buk Buk Buk Buk.
Read the RUE report.

Links courtesy of The Saker and Dmitry Orlov. Also check out Mish's posts on Ukraine.